John’s Movie Musings

It must be difficult to make a good post-apocalyptic movie.  Everyone thinks of Mad Max and since it’s now a classic, Hollywood assumes that’s the only way to make one.  That’s a bunch of crap.  What Hollywood should be copying is Westerns.  They are already set in a wasteland (of sorts).  Just add a bit of sci-fi (not too much) and you’re done.  In fact, if some director starts re-envisioning the old Clint Eastwood movies into post-apocalyptic stories, we’d have decades of great flicks.

The Book of Eli is sort of like a Man With No Name tale…except that his name is in the title for no reason.  The story would have been stronger had he not had a name, but whatever.  Anyway, the “Book” refers to The Bible.  Eli Washington is on a quest to bring the last existing Bible to a place God told him, but has to go through a town run by Gary Oldman.  Oldman just so happens to want a Bible so that he can use the power of religion to control the masses.  If you enjoy classic Gary Oldman villians, then you’re in for a treat.  He plays the part to perfection.

Obviously there are a few religious themes going on, but they are all handled well.  Denzel plays the quiet apostle on a mission from God, while Oldman embodies the famous quote by C.S. Lewis: “Of all bad men, religious bad men are the worst.”  Everything is left vague enough to draw your own conclusions about a theme, but good movies get you talking and thinking about things like that.

One last point I need to make is about the cinematography.  It’s gorgeous.  That’s probably an odd thing to say about a movie set amidst total destruction, but just like the desert, there can be beauty in the wasteland.  That’s why folks go to places God never intended.  Like Arizona.

The Book of Eli has been out for a few weeks and isn’t getting treated very well by the critics.  I can only guess it’s because they wanted another Mad Max clone.  I wanted a “Western in the Wasteland” and that’s exactly what I got.  Adjust your expectations accordingly.

Grade: B

Odds are good you’ve got Office Space in your movie collection.  Odds are better you’ve worked in an environment similar to Initech.  Office Space is held in such high regard because we can relate on so many levels.  It helps that the movie is hilarious and the characters are all memorable, but we’ve all been stuck in a cube farm filling out TPS Reports at some point in our life.

Extract comes from the same guys who did Office Space (Mike Judge), but tells the story from the management side of things.  Sure, fewer people can relate to those stories and jokes, but I can still imagine veins of comedy gold existing there.  Especially when the premise of Extract is about a smaller company getting bought out by a corporate giant.  Comedy gold, right?

Wrong.  Extract is horrible.  Not only do they do nothing with the corporate giant plot, they remove all likable characters and spend too much time on a stupid infidelity sub-plot.  There are some (possibly) funny characters introduced at the factory, but they are completely one dimensional.  Gene Simmons can’t even work in a memorable joke or two.  But maybe that’s to be expected.

All in all, this is a complete waste of time similar to extracting vitamins from turd nuggets.  Stay away.

Grade: D-

So there I was, stuck in the middle seat on a flight home from Christmas.  Normally when I get forced into being the Third Wheel of the Skies, I bury myself in a book and try not to make eye contact with the two people whose personal space I’ve just invaded.  With my focus on Malcolm Gladwell’s latest mixing of causality and correlation, I noticed the foot tappin’ and head bobbin’ of the girl in the aisle seat.  She had her focus on the movie, so I glanced up and noticed The Edge.  The scene cut to a band shot of U2.  That forced me to pop the headphones in to see what that was all about.

What followed was a documentary on the electric guitar by The Edge, Jimmy Paige, and that dude from The White Stripes.  Whoa.  Now I’m not the biggest White Stripes fan, but I get lost in the music of U2 and Led Zeppelin.  I remember watching U23D and completely forgetting I was in a theater.  When I regained my sense of awareness, I wondered if my singing along had been out loud.

That feeling was exactly what I needed for this flight.  The movie is a little stingy with some of the classic tunes, but watching those three guys jam together more than made up for it.  It also helped that they all seemed to be enjoying themselves.  Of course, when you’re jamming with some of the greatest guitarists ever, who wouldn’t?

I’m sure my seating situation greatly influenced my enjoyment of this movie.  But next time you’re in a similar situation, maybe have this one on hand.  It’ll make the flight much more enjoyable.

Grade: B+