Watching a DC Universe movie is a lot like trusting a fart. At best, you’ll get a little chuckle. At worst, you’ll Justice League your pants.
Wonder Woman has been the one bright point in that sea of disappointment. Her first solo movie was great and she alone made Batman V Superman watchable, despite that glass ceiling keeping her name off the title. Batman V Superman and the Woman Tired of This Shit must have been too long for the posters.
In a post-Justice League world, Wonder Woman 1984 was again pitched as the savior of the DC Universe movies. The team from the original was back and hey, who doesn’t love the 80s? Sadly, it seems the immunity from the DC franchise stink has finally run out.
Wonder Woman 1984 is a mess. Logic holes abound. The plot is head-scratchingly slow. The 80s references are meaningless to the point that there is no reason for this to be set in 1984. Worst of all, it insults your intelligence even when you take “movie logic” into consideration. As an example, I’d wager that WWI pilots would not feel perfectly comfortable in a modern fighter jet, but they would know what a firework is.
The sad part is that you can see a good movie buried under the nonsense. Pablo Pascal, sans Baby Yoda, could have been a decent villain and the Monkey’s Paw plot line would have been great. I’m sure the initial pitch sounded like an easy sell. I don’t know where it all went wrong, but the end result is sadly not worth the two and a half hour investment.